Motivational Monday #43

It's that time again and it just happens to be the last day of the month as well. How exciting is that? Not only if it the last day of the month but it is also the last week before the two week Easter holiday, which I can't wait for. It does mean that I am getting closer to when I need to teach almost full time but I'm kind of looking forward to it. I'm looking forward to it NOW but I know the second I start teaching the little darlings and they don't listen to me, I'll be crying my eyes out and wanting to stop teaching them. But it'll be so worth it!

So, as every Monday, it's Motivational Monday and here is my message to you guys this beautiful last day of the month!

The clocks went back on Sunday morning and that means that spring is officially here. It also means that from here on out, the days are getting longer, the mornings are getting lighter and it is staying lighter for longer. Fingers crossed, the weather will start getting better soon. And so, it's Monday, I'm aware of that but it doesn't meant that the day has to be bad. It just means that it is another day where you can make it whatever you want it to be.

Today, my year 5s are performing the play to their parents that we have been practising for weeks and I can't wait. I created all the costumes and all the props so seeing my hard work being made into something is going to be an excellent feeling.

I wish we could all feel like this every Monday and most of the time, it doesn't feel like this but give it a go. Try and get excited for whatever you're doing on Monday because it might be going to a job but if it's your job, try and love it. It'll make your days be much more enjoyable. You picked your career and job for a reason (unless you're unlucky and haven't got the opportunity of a lifetime yet) and so make sure that you find that love again.

Find the happiness in your life and love it on a Monday!

xxx

Mother's Day

I want to wish every single Mum out there a very Happy Mother's Day. As children, we moan and sometimes me may be horrible but they say you are the most mean to those you love the most. As we grow older, you begin to realise how much your Mum means to you and how much you need her! She's a constant in your life and you know that no matter what you do, you will always love her and she will always love you too.

For my Mum and I, life has been a little rockier than usual because of the situation I am living in but that isn't necessarily because of her. I love her to pieces and I can't imagine a life without her. She's an amazing woman and I can't believe how strong she is given everything. Even when we were younger, raising 6 children without any help from the government and working two jobs just to pay for things. She's incredible and I owe everything to her. Even my academic success because without her dedication when I was younger to read with me (even if she did end up falling asleep), I wouldn't be where I am today.

Love is endless and my love for my Mum is endless, I don't ever want to imagine a life without her.

Love you Mum.

Here's a little picture we took for her to put in a frame and put in the house. A little reminder that she raised 6 amazing children and has a grandson with another on the way. What a lucky woman! And what lucky children we are to have her.

Tell your Mum you love her :)
xxx

One Year Anniversary

I can't believe it is a year today that I lost my wonderful Grandad. I still remember that day as clear as day in my mind and even if I wanted to forget it, I know I never will. A lot has happened in that year, both good and bad, and I wish he was still here to see it all.

I miss him every single day and it still doesn't feel real that he isn't just around the corner. Losing someone never feels real, or at least, I never let myself think they are gone because I know the second I allow myself to realise they aren't here in some shape or form, the second I won't want to live any more. 

I don't believe that we spend this long making and securing loving relationships to have them taken away in death. The love never dies even if the person does. Some of you may disagree with me, but for me, my Grandad and my Nan are still around. They're still around somehow, whether that is in the form of a ghost or a spirit or even just living on in the people they have touched with their lives. But they're still here, still watching over me and still smiling.

I hope you're happy wherever you are Grandad. Every first without you hurts but I know that you're finally back where you long to be.

I love you!

xxx

First Day Nerves...

...were unnecessary... 

I think that I always make a mountain out of a molehill and I know I definitely did this for yesterday. I had already spent two weeks with the school, teacher and class beforehand so I don't know why I felt so scared to go back but I guess I thought that perhaps they wouldn't be as welcoming. But I was wrong and a number of the staff commented on how good it was to have me back and I settled right back into the easygoing nature of the school. I know that my nerves of the first day were misplaced and I didn't need to be but I also know that I should still feel a little nervous about my placement.

It's only the first day in and although these first two weeks are technically prep weeks, I still feel a little pressured to do lots of class work. Yesterday, I did a guided reading group and also helped direct the play that the year 5s are doing to the parents on Monday as well as attending a staff meeting. I know that is a fabulous thing to put in for my evidence of wider responsibilities but I'm a little eager to get in front of the class, take a small lesson and see how well I do. I don't think my nerves will be put to rest until I have done this.

I also feel nervous about my essays that are due in during the placement worrying that I won't have time to teach, do all the paperwork for placement and write my essays. I'm a big ball of worries but I know that once I get going with it all and get into the zone of working when I can and completing everything I have to do, I will feel a lot happier and will get into a good flow.

It's the very start of a 10 week placement which will make or break my teaching career. Scary.

We'll see how I go and I know that whatever happens, if you keep reading, you'll be coming along with me and hopefully supporting me, which will make me feel a lot better. Just knowing that I always have someone to listen to me rant makes me feel better even if you might not want to listen. 

I find it hard to rationalise my thoughts and fears on my own so being able to have you guys to write to on a daily basis helps me immensely. And I'm so glad that I'm back to writing my blogs regularly because I missed you guys and I'm probably going to need you all more than ever just to keep me sane. I managed to blog everyday when I was on placement last time so I should be able to maintain it now. Even if that does mean I have to prewrite my blogs and schedule them in the week.

Cheeky!

Hope you're all having a brilliant Tuesday and are not too cold.

Love you all,

Nicole

xxx

Motivational Monday #42

Today is my first date at my new placement school and I am pre-writing this to give you a motivational Monday so who knows how it is going. Make sure you read my blog tomorrow (that I shall be writing tonight) to find out my thoughts on what happened and whether I have stopped being such a ball of nerves! In light of my lack of knowledge of the future to tell you that things you're scared of are never as bad as you seem, I want to give you motivation to go for things that you are scared of even if it does make you a ball of nerves.

Just because it makes you scared doesn't mean that it should be something you avoid. I know that most of the time, the scared feeling is not one that we like. It's not one that we want to keep with us and definitely not one that we consciously thrust upon ourselves but I've a big believer in doing those things to make you scared. What is a life where we keep ourselves safe and secure in a little bubble not trying new things that scare us. I'm not saying we should go near any sharp pins to burst our bubble but pushing our bubble to the limits never hurt anyone. If you're scared of something, you should try even harder to do that thing because then it means you not only have done that thing but you've also overcome a great fear, which is not easy to do!

You don't need to let fear rule your life or get in your way. Sure, it might be hard and you might fail a time or two. But is it better to live in a world where you don't try things and don't fail or to follow your dreams and fears to find a world where you might fail but you'll still be miles ahead of yourself than if you didn't try at all. Life isn't about getting things right and being safe, it's about trying new things and finding out that you don't know it all and you can fail but fail with no regrets and no empty what ifs. 

Go for it. What do you have to lose?

xxx

Placement Nerves

Tomorrow I start my 10 week final placement for my PGCE course and I'm really scared. I felt like this for my first placement but I felt a little more confident because I knen the children were only year 1 and it wasn't counting towards my final grade. BUT this one is counting to my final grade and will determine if I get QTS (qualified teacher status) and it is with year 5 (9-10 year olds), which scares me more than it should. I'm 21 years old and therefore should not be scared of 10 year olds but embarrassingly I am. I don't know how the children will react or how I will react when I stand i front of the class and start to teach them. I've only ever seen myself as a teacher with year 1 because that's the only experience I've ever had. Sure, I've helped in a year 4/5/6 class but it's very different helping the teacher, to being the teacher yourself.

I know there shouldn't be a reason for me to worry this much because I'm not going to be expected to be perfect. I'm learning and will make mistakes but that's one thing that I've never been very good at. I've never been good at accepting my flaws or being wrong or being criticised. Oops, probably in the wrong career but I love teaching and I think once I get into the swing of it and I start teaching more, the fear will slowly subside. I've always said that as long as I'm scared and nervous, it's a good thing. The nerves about doing it right make me care and if I didn't care I wouldn't be right for the job. The second I don't care is the second that I will stop teaching because although when I qualify, I will be a teacher, I will still be learning from now until I stop teaching as every day will be different and every child/class will be differer.

I'm also scared for the workload that I have to do between now and the 10 weeks that I am teaching. This placement is assessed and so I need to do more paperwork than I did before to make sure that I achieve the best grade that I can. It means the long hours that I already did and potentially even longer as well as the increase in documentation AND more teaching time. I will be getting into school at around 7:30 and potentially not leaving until 6:30/PM. That is a really long day especially considering I am not just sat at a desk with no need for contact. I will be stood in front of the class for 6 hours teaching and responding to the children and their moods. It's difficult and for anyone that says teaching is an easy job, I will cut off their legs.

As for the more teaching time, it is expected of me by week 3 to be teaching 75-80% of the time time. If we look at that in days and hours, it means that I will get 5-6 hours free, to observe other lessons, finish my paperwork for uni and lesson plan for the rest of the week. This in total would give me around a day of the week where I will not be "free" in the sense, I just won't be teaching. It's an incredible amount of time and I know people will say that when I'm teaching I will be teaching 100% of the time but I've only been teaching for 7 weeks. That is the time when I've been in a classroom as a teacher. It's not very long and it scares me to think that soon I might be a fully paid teacher in a school where the pressure will not decrease.

I'm a teacher and a student but right now, I feel like a sinking boat. I know I'm probably overemphasising all my worry but I really truly am scared to death of this placement. I hate feeling like this and know that the on slaughter of negative feedback is just around the corner. Many people have told me to not take it personally but I can't help it. 

Ah, I can't stop tomorrow coming and so I need to suck it up, put on my big girl pants and try to get through it. I'm sure I'll get back to you with a diary of my feelings at a later date and I hope they are a little more positive. It's a stab in the dark but I hope they are. I know it'll come from a lot more stressed Nicole.

Never mind, life is difficult but most of the time, it's worth it.

I love you all.

Have a wonderful Sunday and please pray for me tomorrow. I would greatly appreciate it.

xxx

Auntie Two

During the week, my sister who is having a baby in July found out the gender of her little baby and I'm so excited to reveal that....

I will be an Auntie to two precious little boys. 

She is having a boy and therefore by the end of July, I will have two little nephews to dote over and I can't wait!

Babies all around us!!!!

P.s. This is a cute little Max update with his adorable little faceeee.

xxx

Nursery

I've been in a nursery for the week and it's funny because I've only ever worked with children that young once before and I was 16 so I can't really remember what they were like. And considering I have been working with 10 year olds' most recently they seem really small to me now. But as I've spent the week with the little darlings, I ave come to realise how funny they are as tiny humans. At times, they are so small that it feels weird for them to be in a school uniform with a schedule but at other times, they are so mature that they are adults in tiny bodies. I have been thinking about some of the things that I have seen and wanted to report back to you some of my observations.

Image curtsey of Google Images

1. They all want the attention.

If one child is getting attention from you, you are bound to have a million other little bodies come up to you for the attention and they will fight for it. I have had things shoved in my face and been tapped on my leg so many times that I can't count. They don't like not being centre of attention and it's a shame because there's only one of you and 25 of them. You can't split yourself in two.

2. They don't hesitate to tell on one another.

I have been watching the children play for the first week and the amount of times that the children tell on one another is hilarious. I can't help but have a little snigger when a child says "I'm telling on you" and the other child hasn't even done anything but still gets told off. I want to intervene but it's not really my place.

3. They can't dress themselves.

This one might be a little bit obvious but unless you've seen a child of that age, you can't really comprehend how much they can't dress themselves. I've seen children with their jumpers on back to front, their socks half way down their foot, their shoes on the wrong way and my personal favourite their coats inside out. They have not yet understood the concept of how to turn the arms of their clothes the right way round and jam them into it regardless if the seam is pointing outwards. They also just hand their item of clothing to an adult to fix it for them without even trying.

4. They fall over so much.

In one day, there was about 10 children that had got hurt in one way of another. They all came in crying their eyes out wanting a cold flannel or compress. I don't know what it is about the cold compress but a wet towel sedates them and they stop crying. It's weird because if I think about myself, I don't think my first instinct would be a wet towel to stop myself from hurting. But then again, I'm not a child and I think it brings them comfort.

5.They openly pick their nose.

You will be sitting with them and in front of you, whilst they have eye contact with you, their finger will be jammed up their nose rooting for gold. And the worst ones are those that instantly put their finger in their mouth afterwards. It's gross and I stop it every time I see it but they keep going back for more afterwards. It's an interesting thing to see that them without any sense of societal norms that one does not pick their nose and eat it in public.

6. A lot of them do not like to get messy.

Now I went into nursery thinking that all children love getting mucky and dirty especially when it comes to paint and ink but I have been so surprised at how many children would use the very tips of their fingers to paint and to try not to touch the paint. I did vegetable printing with them and so many of them refused to pick up the vegetables if they were covered in paint. Bearing in mind, my whole hands were covered in paint by the end, I didn't blame them! It's messy and I'm not a great fan of having paint all over my but I took one for the team. I even got some paint on my watch!

7. They do not remember.

Every single day, the children ask me what my name is because they don't remember. This isn't a problem because I know they are so small and I'm not the priority in their life but it makes me laugh so hard when they moan at me for not remembering their names. Bearing in mind, there are around 26 children in the morning session and then 26 different children in the afternoon session so that's around 50 odd children's names to remember, which is almost impossible.

8. They are adorable.

You can't deny how cute they are when they come up to you and ask for help or want you to play with them. 3 and 4 year olds' maybe a little mischievous  at times but they are adorable as hell doing it.

Image curtsey of Google Images

Love you,

Nicole

xxx

Spring Favourites

It's finally come to being Spring and for once, the weather is actually adhering to the season quite nicely... For now. In fact, the temperatures we've been having recently have been above average given the fact it is only just Spring, but I am absolutely loving it. I think I like all the seasons for different reasons with Winter being the season to snuggle in comfy, warm jumpers whilst Summer is always loved by me because it's lovely, warm and sunny (well, it's meant to be). But for me. I love Spring for numerous reasons and I thought I would share these with you todayyyyy.

1. It's warmer.

It's always an amazing feeling after a long winter to see the sunshine and feel the warmth on you, especially if it has been raining an awful lot. I love being able to go out without taking a jacket and just wearing a cardigan without feeling cold. There's nothing better than the fresh feeling of the warmth with a nice breeze that makes it bearable to walk around in and work in. It's the time when you know Summer is coming but it's not hot enough to make you feel sweaty and uncomfortable because that's the one thing about Summer that I don't like. I hate working in the Summer because my body isn't the greatest at regulating my temperature when it's hot.

2. It's so much lighter in the morning and the night.

Every Winter, I hate it when the clocks go back and the days get shorter and it's gets darker before you've even finished work. It makes me so depressed and just want to sleep so I'm definitely happy that the days are slowly but surely getting longer and the sun stays out the play for a little while longer. It's almost 6PM and the sun is still prominent in the sky. This only gets better and better as Spring goes on and I wish it were light all the time!

3. Blossom trees.

These are some of my favourite things to see when I am walking down the street. I don't know whether it is because they are such beautiful colours or whether they have a sense of magical when the wind blows and the blossom gets spread everywhere but I absolutely love them. I love the look of the trees and I love the blossom that falls off of it. And when the blossom on the trees starts blooming, I know that Spring is here and I get so excited.

4. Easter is near.

If you know me, you know that I love my chocolate. I would do just about anything if there were no chocolate to get my hands on it. I think it may be a little psychological about why I love it so much but when people say you can have too much of one thing, this is not the case for chocolate and I. And when Spring comes around, Easter is just around the corner and that means that I will soon have a lot of chocolate to get my teeth into. Yum.

5. Summer is close.

When Spring is here, Summer is just around the corner and I can't wait. The closer to Summer I get, the closer I get to finishing my course, having a couple months off and going to Turkey with some of my best friends. Why wouldn't I be happy and excited for Spring to be here?

Which is your favourite season and why? Let me know in the comments below and if I forgot some of the reasons why Spring is your favourite season, also let me know in the comments below.

I love you all.

Nicole

xxx

Inspiration

Now, recently I have been lacking this and I hate it. I hate not being able to find something interesting to write about and to be excited by it. I have felt in a big lull at the moment not feeling like blogging and since I allowed myself to miss a day, I have been completely neglecting my idea of blogging every day. Now I didn't want this challenge to be a burden, but I didn't want to stop blogging full stop so I've been looking for things that could inspire me.

I don't know why I've felt so demotivated to blog and I don't know whether it correlates to the fact that I am pretty petrified of starting my new placement and going back to being judged for every little thing that I do or not. But I shall talk about that fear on another blog to let you all know how I'm feeling a week before my placement starts. For now, I need to get back to doing the thing that makes me happy. Therefore, I have  been searching the Internet for quotes and pictures that might give me a little inspiration and whilst I was, I thought, this would be a pretty good blog idea because then I could potentially inspire you. And considering I missed Motivational Monday today, it's the least I could do!

I need to stop putting things off and get going with what I love to do in the time when I don't have to do the things that I have to do. 

I haven't blogged in a while and I truly am sorry about that. Recently, I've been a moany old cow because I've felt like rubbish and I have been putting off blogging because the last thing I wanted to do was create a blog that was full of my ramblings and moaning. You're much more to me than an outlet for my moaning and anger and so I wanted to try and get a little bit happier to provide you with good content. At the moment, I'm still pretty moany but instead of wallowing in it, I want to blog to make me happy.

I love you, please stick with me during this time. I miss you guys!

xxx

I'm Useless

I can't save people's lives even though I really, really want to; especially in the past couple of years. I'm useless.

I can't change people's health and I can't stop people from dying. I'm useless.

I can't cure cancer and I can't map/eradicate genetic diseases that steal people from our lives. I'm useless.

But

I have blood. 

I have blood that can be used to save people's lives. I have blood that can change people's health making them better and stopping them from dying. I'm useful.

I have blood that can help fight cancer. I'm useful.

In life, there are not many things that you can do but there are small things that make us feel useful.

Today, I am giving blood with my Dad.

It takes 10 minutes to give a pint of blood that can be used to save someone's life. You can be useful too if you have the courage to give blood.

Today, I'm useful.

Turkey Holiday

My friends and I booked a holiday to Turkey to other day for a whole week. Yaaaay! And now all I can think about is going on holiday and I can't wait but it's not until July- ooooooh no! I'm so excited to be finally going on holiday with Hollie and Tom- some  of my favourite people in the whole world and know that it is going to be so much fun. When we were 18, we went on holiday to Wales and we had a ball with so any funny, albeit sometimes embarrassing, stories that we took away with us and I'm hoping that this holiday will provide us with some good memories as well. There's one thing I know, there will sure be plenty of snaps thanks to Hollie ;)

I have been to lots of countries near Turkey with Egypt, Tunisia and Cyprus but I've never braved Turkey. But not because I haven't wanted to, we just stuck with what we knew was lovely holiday destinations and Turkey never got onto our list of places to go. But now I do and I can't wait to see how different it is from other places and how much I like it.

I also want to do a couple trips but having looked at them, there are only a few that I really want to do. I love a boat excursion so I'm hoping that one day, we can get on the sea and sail for the day because the views are simply beautiful from a boat. Wink, wink, nudge, nudge Hollie and Tom- can we go on a boat?

This is a view of our hotel! How pretty. We'll compare what it actually looks like when we get there.

We'll be all inclusive so we can drink and eat as much as we can without having to search around. I wasn't a fan of going outside the hotel in Egypt and Tunisia because some of the men are too full on and I really don't feel comfortable and I've been told that Turkey is very similar so I'm sorry but I don't see myself going out and about all that much when we're away. I just don't like it and if I can, I will avoid it!!

I can't wait for our sunny getaway and hope that it speeds up so we can go already. I need to get online shopping at some point to get some lovely clothes that I can wear there. Exciting!!

AND THERE'S A SLIDE IN OUR HOTEL. You can't get much better than that...

xxx

Never Give Up!

I value all the times I have off of work and get to sleep in without having the pressure to get up and do a million things during the day. What I don't value is getting woken up on those precious days off by builders where I can no longer sleep in peaceful albeit ignorant slumber not thinking about how much work I have to do. I do not value having to get up and then feeling instantly guilty that I did no work yesterday and therefore have to make up for it now.

The problem with me is that I don't mind revising, I don't mind evaluating and I don't mind trying my hardest to achieve all I can but I HATE doing coursework. I spend all the time researching, thinking hard about how I am going to formulate my essay and then submit it with no further ways I can improve it only to get it back and it be rubbish...

It really does discourage me so much and I hope that these essays are at least a little bit of what they want so I don't completely fail like all the other times. It just makes me feel stupid. It makes me feel like I shouldn't be doing a postgrad course and even more, if I can't even get a good mark in my essay, why should I be a teacher?

It's silly, I know and half the thing about teaching is that you don't need to get a good mark in an essay but it does make me feel like I'm not good enough. But instead of giving up, I'm going to finish writing this blog and then try my hardest to make my essays better and put everything into it that I can because if I don't, I know I'll have regrets about not working hard enough.

Thank you for reading my rant, I'll be on my way now...

TA'RAAA

xxx

Motivational Monday #41

Oooooh, Nicole has been seriously slacking in her duties to blog. I feel like the second I allowed myself to miss a day that was  the day that me blogging regularly would go downhill... Oh dear. But I'm hoping that I can pull it back and get back to a good routine. Maybe not everyday, but numerous times a week because I do miss blogging and I miss taking out a section of my day each day to focus on writing for pleasure. This week I have two essays due in on Friday and it has come down to me having to force myself to finish it. And writing has no longer seemed fun for me. I also am under so much pressure by myself to do everything single handedly. It's a flaw of mine. I hardly ever ask for any help from people... But I'm back today and hopefully a couple times this week because I don't have uni or school this week!

This is my motivational message for you today:

No matter what you do in life or how much you achieve, there is always going to be those people in your life that give you negativity. Whether that is negativity in what they say discouraging you or giving you negative thoughts for your successes, or if it's negativity in how they treat you. There will always be those people that criticise your life choices regardless what you're doing. You're either not working hard enough or you are, you're either being too much of a failure or they hate you for being too successful. You can  never really win with some people and there's a point in your life that you will realise you can't please everyone. Before you realise this, you will forever be trying to please them, but you need to remember that you can't stop yourself from doing things simply because they try and put you down.

If you've ever stopped to think and question about what you're doing because you might be judged by someone, you need to throw caution to the wind and just do it! You need to leave behind the reservations and just do it, follow your head and heart without fearing judgement because as the quote said, you will be criticised either way. What's the point in living your life by someone else's rules and still being criticised?

Don't listen to those that spread negativity in your life because they only do such nasty things to try and make their own sad little life happier. Don't listen to them and just follow your heart. You shouldn't be going out of your way to please them, you should be going out of your way to get AWAY from them!!

I love you all and I hope that seeing this blog has made your day a little brighter!

xxx

Throwback Thursday #17

In honour of my nephew being born exactly a week ago, and the fact that I haven't blogged in a fair while, I thought I would share with you another Throwback Thursday with some little baby pictures. I don't have that many baby pictures of myself and I really apologise for the fact you can see the flash and my shadow in these but I hope that you like them!!

I just think these two pictures are so cute and I really do love them. I don't know how old I am but they make me smile so much!

 And this my lovelies, is the first ever family picture that we had! This was the day that my brother was born and you can tell my Nan brought us to the hospital because we look well groomed and are all sporting our matching dresses. If you don't know who I am, I am the one in my Dad's arm (the smallest girl). This picture makes me smile so much because I see us all now but I could never imagine us all as a family when we were little. I love it so much!

And looking at my baby brother, he reminds me so much of little Max now. He's so cute!

I'm sorry for not blogging recently, I've been so busy and tired. And if I'm honest, the time I've had free, I've wanted to spend the time with Max... He's tooooo cute!

xxx

Hello March

I'm really not liking how quickly time is going. I know I say this EVERY month but I don't actually believe how fast the time goes. I only have about 13 weeks left of my course and that scares the life out of me.

This month was the month I have been most excited about for a long time but that was because my sister was due to have her baby in this month. But as you know, little Baby Max came 3 and a half weeks early and therefore that made February a lot more exciting than the prospect of March is going to be:

♥ 1st March - This would have been the day that we celebrated my Grandad's birthday. His actual birthday was 29th February but that only comes around on a leap year, which it isn't this year and so we celebrate it the next day. I miss him so much and wish that my Nan and Grandad were both here to share the happy news we've had in the past couple of days with Max. They would have adored him and I'm hoping that somewhere up there, they are looking down on their Great Grandson and are as happy as we are!

♥ 13th March - I'm giving blood on this day and I can't wait. I love giving blood and having the biggest feeling of achievement and being worthy. I have managed to persuade my Dad to come with me and give blood for the first time and so we'll see how he is with giving blood. It's exciting! I hope he loves it as much as I do. We can be blood buddies!

♥ 14th March - Two of my assignments are due in today and I'm not looking forward to finishing them. I don't do very well with coursework no matter how hard I try and how much time I spend on them. I just don't get good marks and it's so frustrating. I just hope that I pass them, which is all I need to graduate - thankfully.

♥ 17th-21st March - For my course, I have to spend a week in a nursery to see the transition between nursery and school. And if I'm honest, I haven't even secured a place at a nursery yet.

23rd March: This would have been Justine's due date!

♥ 24th March - I start my final placement where I will actually start teaching- it's scary.

♥ 26th March - The year anniversary of my beloved Grandad's passing away. I miss him dearly.

AND THAT'S IT!

xxx